During a visit to a mental asylum, a visitor asked the Director what the criteria is that defines if a patient should be institutionalized.
"Well," said the Director, "we fill up a bathtub. Then we offer a teaspoon, a teacup, and a bucket to the patient and ask the patient to empty the bathtub."
Okay, here's your test:
1. Would you use the spoon?
2. Would you use the teacup?
3. Would you use the bucket?
"Oh, I understand," said the visitor. "A normal person would choose the bucket, as it is larger than the spoon."
What was the director's response?
"No," answered the Director. "A normal person would pull the plug."
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In the fathers will, he states that his sons must race their horse, and the son with the slowest horse will receive the fathers entire fortune. The two sons race, but never finish it, as they deliberately slow their horses. After visiting the oracle the sons race horses as fast as possible. What did the oracle tell them?ANSWER
You have two ropes. Each rope takes one hour to burn. These ropes are not identical, nor are they uniform; i.e. it does not necessarily take half an hour for half the rope to burn (if you have trouble visualizing this, imagine a rope of varying thickness across its length). With only these two ropes and a way to light them, how do you measure out 45 minutes?ANSWER
A murderer is condemned to death. He has to choose between three rooms. The first is full of raging fires, the second is full of assassins with loaded guns, and the third is full of lions that haven't eaten in 3 years. Which room is safest for him?ANSWER
We travelled the sea far and wide. At one time, two of my sailors were standing on opposite sides of the ship. One was looking west and the other one east. And at the same time, they could see each other clearly.
How can that be possible?ANSWER
A man rides into an inn on Friday, stays for three nights and rides out again on Saturday. How can this be?ANSWER
Whoever makes it, tells it not; whoever takes it, knows it not; and whoever knows it, wants it not. What is it?ANSWER
A girl was ten on her last birthday, and will be twelve on her next birthday. How is this possible?ANSWER
A ladder hangs over the side of a ship anchored in port. The bottom rung of the ladder touches the water. The distance between rungs is 30cm, and the length of the ladder is 270cm.
If the tide is rising at a rate of 15cm per hour, how long will it be before the water reaches the top rung?ANSWER
Why can’t a man living in California be legally buried in New York (even if it’s left as an instruction in his will)?ANSWER
Usain and Mo race one another over 100m. When Usain crosses the finish line, Mo is only at the 90m mark. They agree to have a second race, but to make it fairer, Usain will begin 10m behind the starting line. All things being equal, who would you expect to win the race?ANSWER
A man is shown a portrait painting. He looks closely, then exclaims rather cryptically: “Brothers and sisters have I none, but that man’s father is my father’s son.”
Who is the man in the portrait?ANSWER
There are three light switches outside a room. Inside is a single light bulb, controlled by one of the three switches. You need to determine which switch operates the bulb.
You can turn the switches on and off as many times as you wish (they are all off to begin with), but may only enter the room once. There is no one there to help you. The door to the room is closed, and there are no windows, so you cannot see inside. How can you discover which switch operates the bulb?ANSWER
A blue house has blue bricks; a yellow house has a yellow bricks. What is a green house made of?ANSWER
There is a clerk at the butcher shop, he is five feet ten inches tall, and he wears size 13 sneakers.
What does he weigh?ANSWER
If a green man lives in a green house,
a purple man lives in a purple house,
a blue man lives in a blue house,
a yellow man lives in a yellow house,
a black man lives in a black house.
Who lives in a White house?ANSWER
Tool of thief, toy of queen.
Always used to be unseen.
Sign of joy, sign of sorrow.
Giving all likeness borrowed.ANSWER
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